am i that fat?

by fitcakesjuliebeatrice

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as i still got a lot of cheesecake photos, now i can make a post not about food!!! here comes a self-esteem post!!!Image

today i was quite late for my visa taking, so i can’t quite choose what clothes to put on, i grab a black trousers and a purple shirt.

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when i walked on the street, i found myself look SUPER FAT, even fatter than how fat i already am:( then i started to look down as before again,

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to escape from the strangers’ looking, i even sweat so much for my nervousness. i hate to feel like that, having such a low self-esteem.

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when i walked into the hotel, i even felt much fatter, and i was super afraid when i asked the ladies about where the cake shop is.

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i entered the cake shop and felt so fat, too fat to buy cakes, i really walked forth and back before choosing cakes, becuz all the waitress serving there was ladies, three of them, Image

all very slim and have a confident smiling face. me? i just have right at amount hk$96 for choosing two cakes, and a “wanna-die-now” face.

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i quickly picked what i’ve chose, put tiramisu and chestnut cake for next time’s list and leave the cake shop immediately.

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while on the train, i also hide my bag of cakes as i worried slim girls will see that and say i am too fat for cakes. i also worried boys will have the same thoughts.

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for parents, i worried they’ll say they’ll be heart broken if having such a “love-desserts” daughter, and having such much time for going everywhere finding good cakes:(

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i really regret about doing things making myself feel such uncomfortable, as my other friends are planning for their trip or future studies,

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or already working. one of my friend, heather, is now working in IFC pret a manger, WHICH’S once my FAVORITE shop having yogurt and sandwich, 

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to be specific, HUMMUS sandwich, you all know how much i love hummus!!! eating with spoon plain!!!:) i really hope i am as grown-up as her,

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but i am still always staying in that cooking/eating/sleeping/playing computer level, which my bowling is even improving in such a SLOW speed:(

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